Wednesday, October 29, 2008

what will tomorrow bring?

there's always a point in your life
when you're really tired & you're ready to give up...

but after a few moments, you realize its not yet over
and its still worth fighting for...

but then, you stop and think... is it really worth fighting for?

... i have come this far in my life, not knowing where im heading.
There are some decisions i have always regreted doing, but forgot making the same mistake all over again.

im afraid of what the future brings, it might be good or will it be bad luck again?

you are, what you made of yourself...

but who am i?
im a different person when im at home
when im with him
when im with my friends
and when im at work...

there's only one common thing

i LOVE deeply...
and being emotional brings me nowhere else but sadness & loneliness in my life...

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

you are still my mother... and i love you!

ive gone home from work, its past midnight already...
im supposed to be asleep, but i cant keep my eyes shut.

and all of a sudden...

i remembered my mother,
on how he cheated from my father when he was alive,
on how he hated him when he is around,
on how he spent all those money that my father worked for, put into waste
and on how i never felt her love for me at all...

but still...


everyday, i try to pretend i never had that crazy life before, ( and until today )
i wished that everything would go back to the past,
so that i could have changed bad things into good memories,
so that i could have stopped her from doing those things,
and so that i could answer my only question of why she hated me? her own daughter...


but i....


i could never hate her, after all
she is still my mother
she is still the person i miss
she is still the person i adore
she is still my inspiration
and she is still the person i love so much...
though i know she doesnt even care of how i feel for her


i missed her.... so much, if only she knows and if only she feels it too...

mt roller coaster ride...

ive been through a lot of emotional depressions lately...
been thinking a lot of what has happened with my past life too...

all of a sudden all those bad memories came back rushing to me again,
and all those people i love so much,
i have realized how terribly i have missed them.

my life is crazy, its a one hell ride of a roller coaster...
sometimes it made me wish, i was never born....

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

LIES

you told me you love me

but you never made me feel it...

you told me you care for me

but you never even cared at all...

you told me you'll always be there for me

but where are you now?...

you told me lies...

but i still keep on believing...

i have no choice....

Friday, February 8, 2008

for you, but maybe not

maybe i am missing umaybe not
just ur voice and lovely smile in my
thought..yet i dont think i think so much …maybe i am missing the feeling of
missing u..maybe i am angry… maybe not;just too many questions too many
thoughts…wudnt it be gr8 if i get rid of all
expectations….. hmm maybe thats possible… maybenot….how i wish u express urself inslightest,so to make my heart warm and me happy…maybe one day u will do … but then
maybe not…..so i am torn in between …angry ands
erene ;sad & happy ; thinking so much yet
thinking so less.how i want to give u so much yet want
as much as well…shud i stop wen i dont
get much..am i selfish or am ihurt..do i expect too much
or are my expectations just…how i wonder if u will say wat lies in
u or maybe u dont feel as much as i do….that is y u dont say things that i
do…..maybe i am wrong….maybe not …i think too much…i know .. but thats
the way i am…too much love…too much hurt…too much
to everything…boy of extremes…i can only offer u that :: passion : …my elixir… my poison……nothing less nothing more….there is hope … yet its thinning day
by day…speak up is all i can say…maybe its fruitless to expect … maybe
not…..how i wish u understand ur sooimportant to me…in my life , in my heart …. u r my
very soul….and maybe one day i will listen u
speak wat u feel….maybe some day that serendipity i will
witness…...but then… maybe not….

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

We Used To Be...

these sweet couple who dance under the moonlight...

these funny friends, who laugh at each other...


....i just dont know, why i felt out of love
but i miss him...





LABELS : prince

Monday, February 4, 2008

my frog prince...


so, it's still me....


i dont wanna complicate things more for you


that's why i had to let go...


but after all this years,


i still recieve this everyday messages from you :


princess, mahal na mahal parin kita...


sana pag-balik mo ako parin ang mamahalin mo...



ive hurt you so many times...


over and over again...


why dont you STOP?


...i no longer love you


i didnt love you, even just for once


selfishly, the fact that you know


i was only using you to cover up the pain i had with my ex.


its still me, your hearts been shouting for...


im sorry... i said i dont wana hurt you anymore.


if only what you're feeling right now, is what the person i love feel for me...


but not...


its always the same way around.


but what im thankful is...


YOU are just one of the few people, i found REAL...